Living Your Story
Did you read all the great Seven Word Wisdom comments for graduates below? Here’s a funny thing, so many of you wrote something about “dreams” or another form of destiny chasing. Do you actually do this or is that just something we say to other people? (This is the question I’m asking myself a lot lately.)
I recently earned a copy of Donald Miller’s short DVD “Let Story Guide You.” I cannot emphasize enough how much I enjoyed this teaching session. First of all, I kind of heart Donald Miller, but, its OK because so does my husband. : ) Secondly, the ideas contained in his message about the power of story are life-changing. You can see a short clip if you click on the link.
I’ve been hearing bits and pieces of this material for awhile. In fact, I’ve kind of been nervous to listen to the entire message because I knew one of the catch phrases: “What if your life was a movie – would anyone want to watch it?” I had to be honest – I’m not sure!
Don (Can I call you that? I mean “Miller” alone sounds so high-school sports team-ish and “Donald Miller” sounds so formal. You really don’t strike me as a formal guy.) distills the elements of story into these required elements: 1) a likable but not perfect lead character, 2) a worthy goal or objective, 3) some conflict, and 4) an acceptable resolution. The sticking place for me is the “worthy goal or objective” and being brave enough to chase it.
The most powerful part of Miller’s message (high five!) is the fact that an acceptable resolution doesn’t have to be a fiary tale ending – everything doesn’t have to work out perfectly. The power of story is in its telling. For us, in its living out. Don uses the fact that narrative is the most common literary form in the Bible as his illustration, but each story doesn’t end with a 3-point sermon. Instead, we learn about living a life with God by reading the stories of others who have already lived their story.
So I wonder what you think. In the DVD Miller mentions a friend who started Blood:Water Mission. When Miller himself was first gaining the revelation of this idea of story, he spent several days alone seeking God for what his “worthy mission or goal” should be and decided on The Mentoring Project, an organization addressing the fatherless crisis in America.
These are awesome goals, but I wonder if there are other ways to live your story effectively. Ways that don’t require founding a non-profit organization? What other kinds of worthy goals or missions (don’t forget – the ones that require a good amount of conflict are the best from a storyteller’s perspective) do you think would qualify? If someone produced the movie of your life, what goal or accomplishment would you be pursuing?
Color me boring, but I’d have to say my goals wouldn’t change from what they are right now. I want to do all my work as if unto the Lord, and lead my children in the way they should go. It might “sound” easy, but in real-life it isn’t.
Rearing my children in this day and age provides a “good amount of conflict” on its own. Given the number of parenting-related TV shows, I think a movie is definitely do-able. Heading into menopause as my daughter heads into puberty is also providing some fast-paced dialogue and non-stop action. Fireworks and waterworks alone would break the movie budget! We’d need at least 2 stunt doubles for all the eye-rolling that is called for in the script…
To me, parenting is the most “worthy mission” we are called to, next to the Great Commission. And really, if we parent according to the Great Commission, isn’t our family our “Jerusalem”? And we’re training them to go out into “Judea” and all of “Samaria” and even unto the ends of the earth if they are called there.
Seriously though, I do have thoughts about how I can change my work life to be more of a “worthy mission”. That part of the script is still being developed and I keep sending it back for rewrites…We’ll see where that part of the story goes.
End result though, is at this stage in my life, I feel I will have lived my story effectively when my children are able to star in their own God-given role in life.
I am definitely a fan of this concept – of being the lead character in our own lives. I hadn’t thought about the fact that having goals is part of that. I think one of the most worthy goals in the world is to raise children who will face the world with compassion and their own set of worthy goals.
A friend asked me last week what my master-plan is. I was like, “huh?” She insisted I must have a master plan, because I’m like that, and wanted to know what I was really working towards.
It took a while to convince her that I honestly had no idea.
It’s kind of humbling to realize I’ve been spending so much time working toward becoming a “success” of some kind, without having much of an idea what the goal is.
This is something I always struggle with in writing too. I can create interesting characters, and have them tell funny stories, but I’m pretty bad at giving them a goal. It usually takes me a while to figure out what they really want. Which makes a fair amount of success, I suppose.
I think this is a tricky subject. While I am ALL for the “worthy goal” thing (and GOSH do I need to think about that some more!) I think it is all too easy in our culture, even Christian culture to think life has to be dramatic to be significant. I think about the things God told us to do, especially the scripture that says He requires us to “do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God” that aren’t necessarily remotely flashy enough for film. Don’t ge me wrong, I WANT to lead a dramtic life at some point, but when the credits of my life roll what I hope to hear even more than the awed roaring approval of humanity
is the simple “Well done.” from my Father.
I don’t know Molly, but I think she has a great point. We really shouldn’t be concerned with whether a HUMAN would enjoy watching a film of our life. Instead, we should be concerned that our Heavenly Father won’t have to turn His eyes away because of all the sin rolling past on the reel…
This is a great conversation. I have always subscribed to the “my family is my goal” story, and I still do, but what if you don’t have a family? What if Prince Charming never makes an appearance? Then what?
Also, is iy weird that I tell my kids, “Chase your dreams, be anything you want to be, etc.” but for myself just being a good person is enough? What if they need an example more than permission? And what should that look like?
Just some things that are still floating around in my head . . .
Ohhhhhh….so you were asking about my “What if I never got married” dreams…Or more accurately, my “what if I’m suddenly widowed and childless by some act of God” train-of-thought…
That’s a WHOLE different set of goals. I have the location type all picked out, but not the exact location. I would most definitely become a missionary. I’m thinking it would be agrarian in nature, and there are so many possibilities for that, I haven’t decided on the exact place yet. I can just see me strolling into some aboriginal people with my fair skin and red hair and being accused of witchcraft or some other nonsense when their voodoo doesn’t work on me.
Who knows, I could be the next Annie Armstrong or Lottie Moon!
Right, I think this is kind of what I’m asking. And then it has me wondering about why we don’t go ahead and pursue those things anyway even though we have children . . . I mean, if we want them to pursue that kind of dream, shouldn’t we do it ourselves?
Of course, that brings up the question of forcing a child to live in a harsh reality (such as your untimely death or less-than-American-standard living conditions) that might accompany your dream. In which case, I’m thinking we wouldn’t want to do that. But at what cost?
This is so interesting to me. Jump in, everyone, if you have more to add!
I absolutely think we should be the example! I just have so many dreams it’s hard to know which to pursue at what time. Right NOW I’m pursuing the handsome prince, being a godly Mom dream and the worship team dream, and they are all fabulous (most of the time!) Broadway is next. Grin. But seriously, the way I don’t go crazy thinking about all the things I want to be a part of is by remembering that life is full of seasons, and that God doesn’t necessarily mean for us to pursue every dream in our hearts at the same time. (I’m not saying we can’t be planning for them, or honing skills, etc)
I would love it if one of my kids was the next Billy Graham, David Crowder, or Payton Manning for that matter. My question is how do you raise them so that they know that whether they dream of playing on the field or just plowing it that each of those choices can be lived spectacularly for God, and that we will be just as proud of them either way?
Sorry, I’m a little late in replying, but after reading this post the idea of it was swimming around in my head while I was reading “Speaking of Faith-Why Religion Matters-and How to Talk About It” by Krista Tippett and I was struck by this sentence of hers: “I believed-and still believe-that when all is said and done, none of us will be measured on how much we accomplish but on how well we love”. I like that. It soothes those bubbling questions of “what am I going to do with my life?” that rise to the surface sometimes. Love. Okay, I can do that.